Emerald Catron
Emerald Catron has written for Asylum, Lemondrop, MyDaily and Daily Fill. She is one half of rap duo Dem Shortybooz and is a comedic performer around NYC. Follow her on Twitter @emeraldcatron
Emerald Catron
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Tasty Cicada Recipes for When the Swarm Strikes This Summer
Listen, don't read this while you're eating. Come back when you've finished though. It's just that reading about parboiling insects might have a negative effect on your appetite. See, the 17-year cicadas have already started to emerge from the ground, and there are going to be billions of them. BILLIONS. So, you may as well eat some, right?
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How to Annoy Every New Yorker in Under a Minute
Thanks, Buzzfeed! Not only can you name all the ways Todd Akin is just like Zach Morris, or whatever, you also managed to take all of the most annoying things about living in NYC and stick them in one video! We are now irrationally angry.
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14 Adorable Beetles That Won’t Make You Scream in Terror
Generally, when we think of beetles we imagine something black and vaguely menacing, slowly crawling towards our foot. GAH! It turns out, not all beetles are that way.
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Man Has More Fun on Treadmill Than You Ever Dreamed Possible
Wow. We've never had this much fun on a treadmill. Granted, we've never actually been on a treadmill because we've got really bad knees and asthma, but still ... this looks like a lot more fun than the elliptical machine too.
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Obviously the Charles Ramsey Interview Has Been Auto-Tuned
It's been a whole day, folks -- isn't it time to add some levity to that time that guy rescued three women who'd been kidnapped and tortured for 10 years? Apparently it is. Here is the "songified" version of Charles Ramsey's interview after he heroically saved three women who'd been held captive in his neighbor's basement
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21 Examples of Starbucks Employees Completely Massacring Someone’s Name
If there's one thing we love about Starbucks, it's that they always give us a place to go to the bathroom. Aside from that, it's also always a good time when they mix up a customer's name. When a Hong Kong Starbucks employee thought a woman named Virginia was actually named Vagina, we laughed.
We figured why not keep the laughs coming and found some more Starbucks name fails. We also included what the original name is supposed to be, since it's not always entirely clear. You're welcome.
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Awesome Mom Plays Black Keys on the Spoons
Don't be confused by the fact that this video starts with a lady feeding a bunch of kangaroos -- this IS a video of a lady rocking out on the spoons. The kangaroo intro merely adds to its general amazingness.
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See a Homeless Man’s Reaction to Receiving $3,000
A few months ago, YouTube comedy channel Whatever 2ND struck gold when they filmed a homeless man do a pretty ridiculous trick with his mustache. The video went viral, and today it has over 1.7 million views.
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Principal Got Rid of Security Guards and Then Something Unbelievable Happened
Where most people saw a "drop out factory" and "career killer," Andrew Bott saw a school with potential.
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19 Fails That Probably Cost Someone Their Job
Listen, we get it. Of all people, we get it. Sometimes you let an errant comma slip. Maybe you don't notice that something is a sentence fragment because you're riding the waves of hangover nausea. We understand that sometimes being an editor is rough, but how the how do you wind up with a headline that looks like it says "Rapefruit Good for every meal"?
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12 People Who Did an Excellent Job of Quitting
We saw this amazing resignation cake and got inspired. Not to quit our jobs, but to admire the ways others have in the past. Our most "creative" quit was telling the owner of a Chinese buffet over the phone that they couldn't yell at us anymore, because we quit so there. Compared to these, that just isn't that impressive.
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A Last-Minute GIF Guide to Surviving Tax Day
Did you forget that you had taxes to do today?That's okay. Follow this simple illustrated guide, and you should make it to tomorrow.